Barry's on the net!

Bedford's leading political dissident, Dr Barry Monk has joined the space age and published his own campaign website!

Regular readers will know all about Barry's motives, and the local Liberal Democrat's foul play and unsporting behaviour.

He seems to be pressing ahead despite Dr Informed's sage advice to keep his head down......

Choose and Book

We're all doomed!

Just when you thought that people couldn't be any more stupid, it has been decided by somebody that NHS Direct should be made available through digital TV.

That's bloody great. Yet another way to wait 2 hours for a nurse with a computer to phone you back and tell you to see your GP or go to A&E.

How Do You Solve A Problem Like Patricia?

“Hospital closures and new Modern Matrons
PFI ventures with capitalist patrons
MMC bollocks, the chaos it brings
These are a few of my favourite things.

When the polls fall, when the shit sticks,
when I'm feeling sad,
I simply remember my favourite things,
and then I don't feel so bad.”

The Sound Of Bullshit (18 cert 9 years, 490 minutes)

The glory days of musical cinema have returned with this enchanting portrayal of love, incompetence, contempt, ineptitude, corruption, dogma, incompetence and more love. Tony B Liar and director Patsy Fuckwitt have produced a masterpiece which more than does justice to the score and lyrics penned by the creative powerhouse of F.O. Klaus, A. Kidney-Freak and C.R. Mudgeon.

Beautifully filmed on location in Whitehall and Cloud-Cuckoo Land, the film gives a masterful insight into the surreal world of health policy. The songs punctuate the drama and give endearing depth to the lead characters, including a classic reworking of the traditional ‘cuddly-Nazi’ song ‘Edelweiss’

NHS, NHS,
Every morning I beat thee,
I take care
To be unfair
at every turn, then smile sweetly.
Nobody wants what we're forcing through
So what? I couldn't care less,
I'm in a mood,
So you're all screwed,
And you get blamed for the mess.

The lead performance by Patricia Hewitt is a master class of oblivious, patronising pontification of the caliber we have come to expect from her.


The highlight of the movie has to be a Hewitt cheering up a group of young management consultants with the rousing ‘Doh! Oh Dear!’:

Doh! Oh dear! Ah me! Oh dear!
Re-pay all the debts at once!
Me? Ashamed? I tell myself
Far too late the rots begun
So I needn't live in dread
La-bour voters follow still
T. B.'s out his fucking head
And that brings us back to Doh!

You really must see this film, which is destined to become regarded as a classic, even by heterosexual men.

UK 'Brain Bypass' Op Breakthrough

Dr Informed was most intruiged when he saw this headline in the BBC 'Health News' Headlines down there on the bottom of the side bar!

Pah! That's old news, and Patsy Fuckwit is living proof!

du-dum-tschh!

Sense of Humour © Dr Informed 2006

More LibDem Bastardry in Bedford!

Not content with nicking Barry Monk’s domain names, it would appear that Bedford LibDems have also registered the ‘Bedford Conservatives’ Domain names – and set up a ‘smear campaign’ website. The integrity of these scoundrels has sunk to unfathomable depths!

Being an incorrigible sleuth, Dr Informed thought that it might be illuminating to investigate the political scene in Bedford in order to work out the ‘quality’ of opposition to Dr Barry Monk.

Having been directed to this site by the mighty Google, Dr Informed’s well defined masculine chin almost hit the floor! The reference to a ‘conservative activist’ using gay chat up lines has something of a 'Liberal' Democrat Hypocrisy smell about it, doesn’t it? Using Dr Rant’s patented ‘stooge detector’ technique, the culprit can be unmasked:


Visit AboutUs.org for more information about bedfordconservatives.com
AboutUs: bedfordconservatives.com

Registration Service Provided By: NameCheap.com
Contact: support@NameCheap.com
Visit: http://www.namecheap.com/

Domain name: bedfordconservatives.com

Registrant Contact:
dynamoo.com
Conrad Longmore (dynamoo@spamcop.net)
+44.1234325328
Fax: +44.1234000000
26 Heron Heights
Goldington Green
Bedford, State MK41 0AA
GB

Status: Locked


Recognise that name? Dr Informed does! Conrad Longmore is also the registrant of this website.

Why not email the cad Longmore with your opinion of his activities?

So what have we learnt about the quality of politics in Bedford? Firstly Labour are shutting the hospital. Secondly, the Conservatives appear to be a ‘bit dodgy’, (although Mr Longmore doesn’t provide any evidence). Thirdly, the Liberal Democrats are a bunch of amoral scumsucking bastards who epitomise all that is shabby and disgusting about modern British politics.

The people of Bedford will make the right choice come the next election because they have an alternative. It would appear that the Hospital isn’t the only thing that needs saving in Bedford……….democratic integrity is also at stake.

Cometh the hour, Cometh the man, Cometh Barry Monk!

Monopoly Money's too tight to mention

Thanks to Beau Bo D'or for the above picture which neatly sums up what everyone else is thinking about last week's A&E news.

You'd have to be pretty stupid to take evidence based arguments in favour of creating Super A&Es and twist them to fit your policy of shutting the smaller local A&Es..........let's watch Patsy try shall we?

Feed Back Time

Dr Informed cordially invites his adoring readership to let the Liberal Democrats know what they think about their antics in Bedford. In the name of British fair play, these scoundrels need to be told!

Why not click on this link to their discussion forum?

Liberal Democrats- Just as bent as the others?

Good old Dr Rant has made a rather unsettling discovery about the forthcoming electoral ding-dong in Bedford, destined to feature the heroic Dr Monk. Dr Informed has made his distain for Dr Monk's outrageous moral fortitude quite clear, but if there's one thing worse than rocking the boat - it's foul play!

It would appear that the day after Barry Monk announced his intentions, and the creation of a new political party called 'Save Bedford Hospital', the domain names 'savebedfordhospital' were registered by some Liberal Democrats, thus preventing Dr Monk's party from having their name on their website. Not only that, but the domain names in question now link to the Liberal Democrat candidate's web site.

Now not only is this highly questionable behaviour, but it runs contrary to the regulations that govern the registering of internet domain names. It's just not cricket I tell you!

With the bit firmly between his pearly white teeth, Dr Informed decided to 'prod' the offending Lib Dem scoundrels with a gentle email:

Dear Honourable and Noble Liberal Democrat Foot Soldier Salt-of-the-Earth types:

It would appear that you are the registrants of the following websites:

www.savebedfordhospital.co.uk
www.savebedfordhospital.com
www.savebedfordhospital.net

These websites were registered on the 18th of September 2006, and link directly to a Liberal Democrat website.

Here's the good bit:

There's a chap called Dr Barry Monk who works at the hospital. You may have heard of him. Well, he's announced his intention to contest the parliamentary seat at the next election in protest at the downgrading of Bedford Hospital. He announced the formation of a new party - the 'Save Bedford Hospital' party. You'll never guess what date he announced that! Go on, have a guess! What was that?

Yes! It was the 17th of September 2006. Astonishing coincidence isn't it?

Now, I'm a mild mannered chap, but some people have claimed that this is a cynical and underhanded ploy on your part to interrupt Dr Monk's campaign - how cynical is that. However, what you've done could well be considered 'behaviour in breech of the ICANN regulations on the registration of domain names'. Here's my favourite bit:

(iv) by using the domain name, you have intentionally attempted to attract, for commercial gain, Internet users to your web site or other on-line location, by creating a likelihood of confusion with the complainant's mark as to the source, sponsorship, affiliation, or endorsement of your web site or location or of a product or service on your web site or location.

Oh dear! Have a look at the rest on Dr Rant's blog - www.drrant.net

So what happens now? Well, it's all about to kick off from what I hear, and it won't be very pretty for the Liberal Democrats in Bedford - quite counter productive you could say, especially if it all gets a bit mucky (if you know what I mean). If I were you I would consider quietly handing over the domain names to Dr Monk (if he so wishes) and keep your heads down. It's a good job the Conservatives didn't register 'www.libdems.org.uk' before you guys isn't it?

Yours with the deepest of affection


Dr Informed

Barry: Don't be a hero!

Watch Out! Barry's Rocking the Boat again.

You may recall Dr Informed's previous advice to Dr Monk. Well this time, I fear he may have gone too far. If he carries on this manner, then the Government might stop listening to the medical profession when formulating health policy. Without the guiding hand of our profession, Health Policy could become based on poorly thought out, politically driven knee-jerk directives based on dogma rather than evidence. Where would we be then?

Dr Monk's campaign group have release today released a strongly worded press release which will prove highly embassing to the government should it be widely circulated. It's a good job that not many people read Dr Informed's blog then isn't it, because here it is:


So this is how it works

Two weeks ago, senior managers at Bedford Hospital, a former three star NHS Trust, now labouring under crippling debts, were called in by the East of England Strategic Health Authority for a dressing down. The message was unambiguous – they were not being sufficiently radical in closing services in a vain attempt to balance the books; having four wards shut (and another to go in January), over a hundred unfilled vacancies, and one in seven of the workforce on redundancy notices was not sufficient.

One particular reason for the SHA’s ire was the discomfiture being generated by the Save Bedford Campaign, and its vociferous leader, consultant dermatologist Dr Barry Monk. His campaign was first launched on 17th September amidst a storm of publicity. Health minister, Patricia Hewitt, accompanied by the chief Executive of the NHS David Nicholson, visited Bedford in an attempt to damp down concerns. Their visit was not an unmitigated success. Later that month, The Guardian described Bedford as Patricia Hewitt’s “worst nightmare”, and the BBC’s Politics Show said that the local Labour MP, Patrick Hall, defending a majority of just over 3000, was “a dead man walking”.

Clearly then, the SHA, no doubt under instructions from the Department of Health, expected something appropriate to be done to remedy the situation. This week, Bedford Hospital has done what expected of it, and in a document entitled “Defining Our Future Role” have indicated that Dr Monk’s highly regarded department is not required.

Dr Monk commented “ the dermatology department at Bedford Hospital deals with patients who are affected by severe skin disorders which cannot be adequately managed in the community; we are highly regarded by our patients, and by our local GPs, we meet every government target, and we actually generate income for the Trust., so one an only speculate as what motivates these proposals.”

He continued “in the NHS we have become used to irrational decision making, but when personal spite is allowed to intrude, something has gone very seriously wrong.”

Dr Monk is undeterred; indeed his campaign to obtain proper local provision of healthcare for the people of Bedford is being carried forward with renewed vigour.

Ouch! I hope for the sake of calmness and the status quo that Barry's campaign group don't get a website and and a 'corporate identity', because then the proverbial really might hit the fan!

GPs to blame again!

Doctors yet again in the firing line, this time due to an ambulance crew undertaking an uneccesary 400 mile round trip in an Ambulance (although the story actually involves GPS sattelite navigation, rather than General Practicioners, we're so used to being bashed in the press that you'll have to excuse a little paranoia). The supposed 12 mile patient transfer between Brentford and Ilford in Essex went slightly wrong, with the ambulance ending up in Manchester.

Apparently the crew hadn't realised they were being being led up the garden path, despite subtle clues (like Birmingham).

In a disturbing twist, several local 'personal injury lawyers' are to sue the Ambulance trust for wasted time, because what should only have been a brief ambulance chase took 8 hours.